Often when I tell people what I do they are surprised – most have never heard of a ‘divorce coach’. In truth I became one after my own long journey, and with a strong desire to help others get through what can be the toughest time in someone’s life.
After 10 years of marriage and living an overseas expat life in Australia and Asia, my marriage came to an end. Not knowing what to do, or where I should be, now I was no longer with my husband, I came back to the UK. I filed for divorce in a lawyer’s office without anyone to guide me.
I had no profession to return to, or any idea what I wanted to do next. There was so much uncertainty for my future, it was like being on an emotional rollercoaster. In time I did manage to find a job in the incentive travel industry which I enjoyed, and a year later I met my current husband. We moved to Monaco where we lived with our young daughter. This was a wonderful time and great friendships were formed. It was during and after that time that due to relationships and marriages of friends and acquaintances ending, I became interested in the story of divorce and all its complexities.
Re-training in the US
It became apparent that to support someone at this life-changing time was so important. I supported some friends through their challenges, drawing on my own experience. A friend then encouraged me and led me to divorce coaching which I did not know existed. I decided to train as a certified divorce coach, however this was not available in the UK as this was only a recognised and valued profession in the US. As I did not have a master’s degree the only way that I could apply was to be a life coach. So that’s where I started my journey of re-training. The more I learnt the more I wanted to do. I realised that age is no barrier. I found the benefits of coaching worked so well on my own life that I wanted to help others on this path.
A life coach approach
Having training in the process of life coaching has been crucial to equipping me as a divorce coach. A life coach is someone who assists the client to achieve their goals and objectives by listening and probing to help them understand their story and being supportive and structured to help them achieve more. This safe and confidential environment can help facilitate change. It’s about taking that individual on a journey of personal growth. This training is so helpful when I work with clients, as many are at a crossroads and don’t know what they want to do with the rest of their life, like I was when I went through my own divorce.
Specialist training
With a foundation of coaching training behind me, I was keen to qualify as a certified divorce coach. This speciality sits under the umbrella of professional coaching. A divorce coach works with the client on the cycle of change and the process of transition to move them to the likelihood of success each and every time. The process focuses on specific problems and challenges that an individual will experience through divorce, enabling them to make the best possible decisions for their future. I loved the training, connecting with fellow students from all over the world. Many were lawyers wanting a different way to approach divorce. We were schooled in how to support clients to come up with solutions and strategies whilst holding them responsible and accountable. The rigorous training included online practice coaching. I was very proud to complete the course and to receive my certificate as a certified divorce coach!
Now, with 3 years’ experience and having worked with many clients, I can say that I am very proud and happy to support people when they are going through challenges. Seeing the results when someone has regained power and confidence to move through their story of divorce for their best possible outcome is the greatest reward for me.
