Divorce Dilemma: Understanding the Choices Between Formal and Informal Separation
Navigating through a divorce can be a challenging journey.
The individual you once envisioned spending a lifetime with, the relationship you cherished, and often the family unit you built together, now stand disrupted. It's natural to feel a whirlwind of emotions - sadness, overwhelm, and undoubtedly, one of the most stressful life events you may encounter.
Regardless of your current stage in this process, it is crucial to have a clear understanding of the available options in order to make informed decisions.
Understanding the Separation Process
Separation, whether formal or informal, affects individuals differently. It's a significant step for both parties, often paralleled with the grief of losing a loved one. This rollercoaster of emotions might encompass shock, sadness, anger, and even denial.
Seeking professional support from a Divorce Coach or confiding in friends can provide valuable solace and comfort.
During this phase, sleepless nights, impatience, and heightened emotions are common. You may experience physical symptoms like increased susceptibility to illness, difficulty concentrating, or memory lapses. Embracing the full spectrum of emotions is part of the journey.
The grieving and separation process present myriad challenges, from discussing the separation with your children to managing expectations from other loved ones.
What is a Formal Separation?
In the UK, there are three primary options, depending on your situation:
If you’re married and want to permanently end your marriage, you should apply for a “divorce”.
For civil partnerships, opting for “dissolution” terminates the partnership.
If you don’t want to get a divorce or dissolution, you can get a “legal separation”. This is the alternative for those who oppose divorce or dissolution due to religious or cultural reasons.
If your marriage or civil partnership spans less than a year, a divorce or dissolution isn't immediately possible, though a legal separation remains an option.
A legal separation is also known as a ‘judicial separation'. It lets you and your partner make formal decisions about things like your finances and living arrangements, except you will remain legally married, or in a civil partnership, to one another.
Early agreement on certain aspects of separation can streamline the process and reduce associated costs. Mediation offers a viable option if tensions rise or you cannot reach an agreement at this point.
Formal separation entails addressing maintenance payments, child living arrangements, financial division, and other pertinent conditions. If the contract is breached, then the matter will most likely end up in court.
Consulting a Divorce Coach helps weigh the pros and cons of formal separation arrangements.
What is an Informal Separation?
An informal separation is where a couple has chosen to live separate lives but not taken the step to end the relationship – whether a marriage or a civil partnership – legally.
If you’re considering this path, it is important that you document the date the separation began, as well as anything you agree on in terms of division of property, finances, and arrangements for children.
If you require more support and advice navigating your separation, book a call with me and let’s get you on the right track.